The Crying Game Question

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I have a friend who I don’t see often but write to as regularly as I can. This is something I wrote her just a little while ago, which may amuse some of you…

The Latest News In How Johnny’s Is Making Me Gay

KAT-TUN’s Kame-kun is currently starring in the drama One Pound Gospel, as I told you a while back. Anyways, one of his co-stars is a member of Say! Hey! Jump, Yamada Ryosuke. And Ryo-kun looks a LOT like one of my favorite Hello! Project girls, Murakami Megumi. As in, when I first saw him in the drama, I thought he was a girl. Lemme find pics…

Megukami.

Ryo-kun.

Now, Megukami got kicked out of Hello! Project a year and a half ago because she was caught dating a boy. And she was one of my absolute favorites, perhaps second only to Momoko at the time. So seeing Ryo-kun has been like watching Megukami return, except now Megukami is no longer a prettty girl but a pretty boy.

So in my twisted mind, that makes me ask what I call The Crying Game Question: if I had a chance to get intimate with someone who looks just like a favorite idol of mine, but that person was a boy and not a girl, would I do it? And in the case of Ryo-kun, it was an immediate yes. I think if we’re talking about a boy who looks just like Momoko, I’d also say yes. As for a man who looks just like Amuro Namie, I think I’d say no.

Thankfully, none of this will ever be tested in real life.

So my question is: if you had a chance to sleep with someone who looks EXACTLY like your favorite idol but was the opposite gender, would you do it? Or would you draw the line with some lookalikes and not others? In the case of a Namie she-male, I think it just wouldn’t be as satisfying, which I think is an even stranger thing to admit than the notion that Ryo-kun as a Megukami-replacement would be satisfying.

I want everybody to close their eyes, indulge their steamiest fantasy about their favorite idol, except looking down, you see the wrong set of genitalia. How do you react? Full steam ahead (so to speak), or run away screaming?

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20 Responses to “The Crying Game Question”
  1. jim says:

    If they are shaved.

    Possibly more likely with the Yoss.

  2. broomhead says:

    You HAD to make an entry of this on AmeWota, you just HAD to. I got it out of my head for a while and now I am back at square one.

    You know my answer..

  3. craig says:

    i’d cry for sure

  4. Otingocni says:

    “I think if we’re talking about a boy who looks just like Momoko, I’d also say yes. As for a man who looks just like Amuro Namie, I think I’d say no.”

    I’d say the operative words here would be ‘man’ and ‘boy’. It would seem you like them young on both sides of the fence Mr. Mescallado. (Just kidding)

    Having said that, I think I understand what you mean. I’d personally go gay for some guys, but only if they are prettier and more effeminate than I am. If they are in any way more masculine than I am, be it from broader shoulders, a squarer jaw, a hairier body or a bigger dick, I’d consider it a deal breaker. I would feel a need to be the “man” in the relationship and that extends to attitude and personality as well. But, like with Bou? I would wreak that shit. I’d ruin him. He would never be able to walk straight again. Anyway, if somebody has on more makeup than my demented grandmother and goes to the hair salon more than my sister is it still gay? What was that? It still is? Well whatever.

    I have to agree that boy-Momoko would be pretty hot, particularly if he had her eyes and lips. Also her arms folded, pinkies out, girlish, preternaturally feminine persona would be a real winner. Though, I would say instead of boy that looks like Momoko, I’d rather fantasize of Momoko, having been born as a boy, who was raised as a girl by her “Stage Mom” mother to be a near perfect idol machine to make up for her own frustrated dreams of stardom cut short by teen pregnancy. In this way it would be the “real” Momoko, only with a penis. (That storyline shows that I read far too much dirty manga.) On the other hand, I am nowhere near as excited by the prospect of a chance with a boy-Miyabi.

    So to answer your question: yes. Yes, depending on certain conditions.

    Jim: Shaved where?

    Thank you for your time. “Ah! Momoko-kun~!”

  5. CJ Marsicano says:

    I might as well be the one to play icebreaker and get this particular answer out of the way early…

    The day I look down and see a dick between Reina’s legs, it had better well be MY dick.

  6. Henkka says:

    Hahaha, someone had to say it at some point. Nicely put, CJ. πŸ™‚

  7. Garamon says:

    If some male looked exactly like Sayumi, I think I might be able to see past him having a dick, and fuck him in the ass while screaming “Oooh Sayumi I love fucking your sweet ass!!” πŸ™‚

  8. pengie says:

    This is where I point and laugh because my favorite idols are female, and so am I!

    … I think that speaks more about the sad state of my life than it does my sexuality.

  9. Julia says:

    If I tried to stop thinking about the fact that I’m straight and go through with it anyway, I’d feel all guilty and unhappy with myself after the fact. Definitely wouldn’t be good. Knowledge of that would be enough to stop myself, though I think if it were to actually happen and I just DISCOVERED it, I wouldn’t need to stop myself…I just wouldn’t want it anymore.

    Otingocni’s comment is pretty amazing. Mention of Bou reminds me of my past thoughts that eventually led to me deciding that despite how much he looks like a girl and how I, too, thought he was a girl when I first saw him, I would SO tap that, because underneath that skirt, he still has a penis. So I guess I have my priorities. And he’s hot. I don’t know. Maybe finding him hot without being able to see the penis makes me gay for his feminine appearance? Whatever. On the other side, I think when Yossie looks like a boy it’s pretty hot – especially that picture where she looks like a Jrocker – but I wouldn’t tap that. There’s no penis in those pants.

    …Let’s just pretend I’m 18. It’s too late for me to shield my eyes, anyway.

    Also, lol to Garamond, and pengie, I was thinking “this doesn’t apply to pengie” since Ray posred it. XD

  10. Julia says:

    Make that “posted”.

  11. Vee says:

    This is when being bisexual totally pays off!!!!

  12. Jupitermaiden says:

    I would definitely cry.

  13. Becca says:

    I’m bisexual, so I never get to play this game. That said, it’s not so clear-cut even for me. Obviously, neither set of genitals is going to freak me out, but this isn’t just a simple parts swap. Things that are attractive on women aren’t always attractive on men. For example, I love Yossie’s tomboyish nature but if she were a man, she’d come off as effeminate – and that’s assuming that any striking resemblance the two share extends to personality as well. I don’t know if it does in this imaginary scenario. If the resemblance is only physical, it’s highly dependent on the individual idol. For people like Sayumi, whose beauty is in their femininity, no. It just wouldn’t translate. Others – like Goto Maki, who isn’t so soft – would make attractive men and yeah, I’d be as likely to sleep with a good-looking man as I would a good-looking woman.

  14. ryoutarou says:

    I’d so do an Eric Kamezou XD

  15. Raid says:

    Somehow, I don’t think I’d want to do someone who looks like hirai ken, scruffy and all, yet was a female.

    I mean, how WRONG would THAT be.

    On the other hand, I think i won’t mind a male koda kumi. xD

  16. Vee says:

    I’m with you, ryoutarou.

  17. celestia says:

    I don’t think this works quite as well for girls because manly looking women really aren’t very attractive are they? Pretty boys though…. I can think of quite a few boys who look a lot like girls who I would do in a heartbeat. I guess that doesn’t count though, does it?

  18. oroitsme says:

    I’ll be honest with myself and admit that half the Johnnies boys I like look like girls anyways, so it wouldn’t really be much of a stretch. πŸ˜€

    But for the few girls that I idolize… I honestly don’t know. I can’t even imagine what someone a male Kashiyuka would be like.

  19. crs says:

    celestia, in this case, I think you forgot the non-heterosexist caveat as in: “manly looking women really aren’t very attractive *to most straight people*.”

  20. Hanachan01 says:

    I have actually thought about a male Yossie before this, and yeah, I’d still hit that. Sometimes I like to think of what Ishiyoshi would be like if they were a het couple. It’s still pretty hot!

    I like to joke with my friends that Mikitty is my J-pop girlfriend, but I think I’d like her less if she were a guy. Where as a girl her bitchiness makes her seem cool and weird, as a guy I’d think she’d be boring. But I don’t know. A male Mikitty is hard to imagine. Male idols usually bore me.

    I’d probably tap all the members of Dong Bang Shin Gi if they were chicks. As dudes, though, I’d rather see them tap each other! xD No, I’d still probably do them if they were guys!

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