Ayaya Eats with DEF. DIVA, Cheers with Hinoi Team

Filed in Cult Of Pop 2.0

Matsuura Aya may have gone both diva and DEF. DIVA, but a couple of recent TV appearances show that the playful, weird side of her is still lurking underneath. And even if she doesn’t get to flex that goofiness as much with all her ballads and ice tea drinking, that Ayayaya aspect of H!P’s quintessential idol is as charming and funny as ever. (These clips were obtained from Jpopsuki and Hello! Tracker for those interested.)

On Hey! Hey! Hey! the comedy duo host of Downtown – who always strike me as looking like (and having the temperaments of) a Yakuza hitman and his mildly retarded buddy – share some food with DEF. DIVA. Ayaya recommended some udon noodles and strongly urged everyone to eat them without biting down. Just shovel the noodles into your mouth and then savor the flavor. Her reasoning: such effort is made to make these long noodles, why ruin it by cutting them up with your teeth?

Listen: with anyone else, I’d be skeptical. But if Ayaya is going to tell us this, she probably has a point, right?

At any rate, Downtown’s Matsumoto (the Yakuza suit guy) manages it, Hamada (the doofus friend) almost chokes doing so. The three other girls of DEF. DIVA apparently pay this bit of Ayaya madness little mind.

When it comes to dessert, chosen by Gocchin and Nacchi (Rika had recommended some curry dish with the udon), Ayaya resists chowing down on the variety plate of ice cream, cheescake, and chocolate cake. Her reason? She doesn’t like to mix her food together, she likes to eat one kind of food at a time. You know: first all the peas, then all the mashed potato, then all the steak, and so on…

I’ve known a few people who are like this. If you’re in the right frame of mind – or the wrong one, rather – such a habit will drive you crazy to watch. It’s a kind of OCD dinner theater. You want them to mix it up just a little bit – get a bit of mashed potato in with the peas, just a smidgen of it! – but of course, that won’t happen. If it does, the meal is ruined for the person.

So as you can guess, this quirk annoys the hell out of me. But for Ayaya to admit to this is sweet. Not only can this quirk be forgiven, it should be applauded in her case! Watching Ayaya eat would probably be wonderful, no matter what order she chooses or how methodically she approaches her morsels.

I haven’t really said anything about DEF. DIVA, have I? Well, I haven’t been paying much attention to them. I think I need to watch their PV a few times and come to some kind of conclusion.

So now we move on from tasty food to highly questionable taste. On Utawara Hot 10, Ayaya shows just how good a sport she can be by doing a cheerleading routine with a whole bunch of kids and Hinoi Team. Working with children and, um, children, isn’t the rough part, though – the horror is that the innocously cute routine is in service of "Pecori Night", a horrible remake of a horrible seventies song, "Saturday Night" by the Bay City Rollers.

I’m old enough to remember the original and rollerskating around to it at the local rink when I was a child; therefore, I think I’m entitled to my deep-seated loathing of the song and any derivatives it spawns, including this one. That said, I do understand that people younger than me can find a certain kitschy appeal to the song and think it’s cool the same way other relics of the past – skinny ties, swatches, Mayan ritual sacrifices – are also cool in a retro kind of way. In that light, Ayaya makes a good show of it and seems to have a lot of fun in the clip. The kids seem to be thrilled at working with some honest-to-God idols, and they have a whole stadium to pose and march and wave their pom poms around…

But forget Ayaya! Look at Hinoi Asuka! Good Lord! Her hotness is overwhelming! She can get away with wearing friggin’ pigtails and making it look sexy! Why, just being around her must have caused sudden growth spurts in at least a dozen of the kiddie cheerleaders! I’d actually pay good money to watch her eat one food at a time!

The rest of Hinoi Team looks great as well, I should add. While I’ve never had any cheerleader fantasies – well, none that couldn’t be replaced with a nun or a waitress or a Mayan high priestess- Asuka and her girls certainly provoke the possibility…

Really, is there any group better suited to a photobook or a travelogue DVD along the lines of Wings of My Heart or the Alo-Hello series? It’s a crime that they’ve released neither yet. These girls could have fun wherever they go – you can drop them in the middle of a jungle, turn on a boombox with some para para music, and they’ll just start dancing. (Oh, wait – that’s the video for "King Kong"…) What the hell, AAA already has a photobook out, Hinoi Team should have six – one for each girl, and two of the group as a whole (bikini and non-bikini).

I sometimes forget, but I love Hinoi Team. Love them. I don’t take them seriously most of the time, but whenever they catch my attention they have my full attention. "King Kong" may have been stupid and raunchy, but it was a great PV nonetheless. "Ike Ike" was mindless but hypnotically so. I especially love Asuka, who proved she had talent when she was going solo, and Keika because… well, just because. 

Hinoi Team completes a Holy Trinity of U-15 girl group idols, along with SweetS and Berryz Koubo. (This doesn’t get supported by the hemisphere model, but I’ll fix that later.) I’m sure there are some other young girl groups out there worth my time and money, but these three are the gold standard, the full range of diversity one expects from this particular category of idols.

I have no problem with Hinoi Team doing silly songs like this. I’d have no problems with them doing para para polka or anything else, actually. Like Ayaya at her most playful and charming, there’s a certain… something… that makes usual aesthetic or logical decisions seem beside the point with Asuka and friends. But that can be a danger in itself, can’t it? I’d love to see Asuka and Keika take in a whole mouthful of long udon noodles without biting down, except my brain’d probably explode and I’d wind up in a lower circle of hell for the thoughts it’d provoke. But maybe that’s just me.

Feedback

Comments (Comments are closed)

3 Responses to “Ayaya Eats with DEF. DIVA, Cheers with Hinoi Team”
  1. jordi says:

    I always thought the Gorie songs were quite amusing – especially his ability to actually dance with the cheerleaders flawlessly. The Japanese school I went on exchange with tried to do the Mickey routine for their sports festival and failed. But it was good fun. And I think the point of the songs arent really for their artistic value.

    I’m a bit of an eater who only eats one thing at a time (usually the worst to best) – though I’m working on eating other things at the same time XD

  2. Hi jordi:

    I acually read my new comic books from worst to best, so I can understand the impulse from that angle…

  3. Asamiya Saki says:

    Arigatou gozaimasu…!!!! ^_^

    Love Ayaya and DEF.DIVA…!!!